Taking Revenge? On What???

Some traders can get very angry when they choose a wrong currency pair for the position. When I trade nowadays, I usually trade 3 major pairs: EUR/USD, USD/JPY, and GBP/USD. And suppose I think it is more probable for GBP/USD to move strongly in its currently formed uptrend. And so I took on a Long position waiting only to see it not moving at all but instead the other two pairs going through a rather rapid move. Yes, this means I just ended up leaving lots of money on the table in the market. I didn't have the slightest idea to think that it was MAYBE also possible for the two to go in my favor.

My first reaction: Oh, shoot... Why didn't I see the move in advance? Then I USED TO feel bad about myself who acted like a moron. And next I USED TO get very angry about myself. Why I who should have known the probability of the maket going that way didn't even think about taking the postion no matter how small the postion might be. Basically, it is all about REGRET, REGRET, and REGRET. And once I finish feeling pity on poor me, I had to find something else to absorb all my anger that had been just triggered by my wrong decision in trade.

And that must be "REVENGE."

If I think about my emotional ups and downs while watching the very volative move in the market in real, the most strong emotion, or I shall call it "state" used in NLP, it must be this one.
Maybe this is about victimization. Always blaming somebody or something and never take any responsibility whatsoever.

But on what did I want to take revenge? On the market? On whatever I think was the cause of my loss or failure???

If I didn't know NLP, this viscious cycle of my not so useful idea will lead only to more losses in the market. Why? Because the moment I feel I was "wrong" and I made a "mistake," I will never reach the ideal state of a successful trader.

In the world of learning, there is no mistake but feedback. Whatever I decided when taking my position, there is a correspondent consequence. That is it, and it is as simple as that.

Now I don't even think to take any revenge on the market when I lose because I know that is unproductive. Besides, there is nothing I can achieve by taking revenge. It is like living in the past. The truth is, the past is the past. And instead of saying "forget it," I prefer to say, "just reframe it!" as it is always the case in NLP. And this has some implication mentioned by John, "problem is never a problem but state is the problem."

Sometimes, my "mistakes" imply that there are still some very important lessons I needed to learn. If so, I should appreciate my "mistakes"a lot more. As long as I can sincerely say so, there is always some feasible improvement in my trade performance. So there is no need to feel anything! And in other occasions, my desicions are not even mistakes in terms of probability. When I chose to take on the position, I consciously and unconsciously see the winning probability of that position was higher than the others. And since there is nothing in the world that is known 100% right, just because my outcome was not the favorable one, we cannot help the outcome. So for either case, there is no point feeling disturbed by my "mistakes" since they are not really mistakes.

When I really understood this useful belief on mistakes, I realized that I had become a better trader!